- ‘Oh dear, I seem to have been eviscerated. Well, time to drive myself to the hospital.’
A forceful sneeze can be a painful experience. Your abs might cramp or you may even rupture blood vessels in your eyes or lungs.
But that’s nothing compared to what the gentleman in our story went through.
A 63-year-old man had just undergone an operation to treat his recurring prostate cancer. He had been recently released from the hospital and had the sutures removed from his well-healing wound.
After getting the staples taken out, he went to grab breakfast at a restaurant with his wife. During the meal, however, he happened to sneeze.
And then his guts spilled out of his stomach.
The man sneezed so hard that he tore open his surgery wound. Not only that, the pressure ejected his intestines through the now-gaping hole.
There’s a happy ending to the story, though. The man survived, and he didn’t really seem to mind all that much that his guts were hanging out of his body.
We’re saying that because if he’d had his way, he would’ve driven himself to the hospital.
A Fight with Cancer
The unfortunate man’s bizarre post-sneeze catastrophe was detailed recently in the American Journal of Medical Case Reports. The paper only identifies him as “a 63-year-old man.”
He has sadly struggled with his health in the past. He has a history of stubborn prostate cancer that just doesn’t seem to want to go away.
Nine years prior to the sneeze incident, the man had had his prostate removed. Yet, the cancer returned, this time in his urine bladder.
So, at his doctors’ recommendation, he underwent cystectomy. That is, his entire bladder was cut out.
The surgery went well and the man recovered quickly. Soon enough, he was allowed to go home.
Roughly two weeks later, he came in for a routine check-up. The doctor determined his surgery wound had healed so well that it was time to remove the surgical staples.
One Tough Cookie
After the hospital visit, the man and his wife were hungry. They certainly had reason to celebrate the man’s recovery, and they decided to do so by getting breakfast at a restaurant.
During the meal, however, the man happened to sneeze hard, followed by some coughing. Immediately afterward, he felt a sharp pain in his lower stomach.
Then he felt a sensation he described as “wet.”
We can only imagine the thoughts that went through the man’s head when he looked down. His surgery wound had ripped open and multiple loops of his intestines had burst out onto his lap.
The man later explained that he wasn’t sure how he should react to the situation. Being a gentleman, however, he courteously covered his spilled guts with his shirt to spare other diners from the horror.
He then told his wife that he was going to drive himself back to the hospital.
Look, you can’t say the man’s not tough as nails.
Confused Paramedics
Perhaps fortunately for the man, his wife managed to talk him out of getting behind the wheel. After all, moving might’ve damaged his ejected intestines — or caused even more of them to spill out.
So, they called an ambulance, which arrived four minutes later. Those were probably the longest minutes in the lives of everybody at the restaurant.
We’re sure the situation had been described to the paramedics, but they were still flabbergasted. Would you believe that their training doesn’t cover a “man sneezed and his bowels exploded out of him” scenario?
Fortunately, one of the paramedics remembered attending lectures about abdominal wounds that recommended keeping the injuries and any exposed organs moist. The medics soaked a sterile stomach pad with saline, secured it in place with gauze, and sped the man to the hospital.
Long story short, the doctors successfully stuffed the man’s guts back into his abdomen. The intestines had not been damaged so the operation was honestly surprisingly straightforward.
Relatively speaking.
This time, however, the doctors decided to take no chances. They sewed the man’s guts shut with an impressive collection of sutures and staples.
Six days later, the man left the hospital once more, reportedly in good condition. The final diagnosis he received from his doctors simply listed his condition as “evisceration.”
That’s a hospital discharge document you just might frame and put up your wall. You know, as a conversation piece.