10 Strange Tales of Balls

1The Colombian soccer player whose kick resulted in his death

Football is the world's most popular sport. For soccer players, making it to World Cup is a dream realized. Unfortunately, for Colombian player Andrés Escobar a mistake during the 1994 game may have led to his tragic death.

During the 90s, Colombia was rife with drug-related violence, even more so than it is today. Back then, cartels in Colombia funded a football teams. The Medellín cartel, led by Pablo Escobar, backed the Atlético team, of which Andrés Escobar was a player.

At the 1994 World Cup, hosted in the United States, expectations were high for team Colombia. 35 minutes into the Colombia vs. United States game, Escobar slid in to cut the ball, but it hit his boot and flew into his team's net. Colombia lost the game 2-1, and were eliminated from the World Cup.

Ten days later, in the early morning hours of July 2, 1994, Escobar was shot several times in the back with a .38 pistol while leaving a nightclub with friends. Witnesses claimed the assailant shouted “golazo” (an expression for a memorable goal) after every shot.

There are many theories about the murder, but most believe the cartel killed Escobar as a punishment for spoiling their football bets.

2The giant mystery balls found in the jungles of Costa Rica

In the 1930s, while clearing the jungles of Costa Rica for banana plantations, workers discovered large stone spheres buried in the jungle floor. Although hundreds were initially found, almost all were destroyed by treasure hunters who blew them up, believing gold to be inside. Some balls were moved, only to be destroyed by vandalism. Others eroded over time. However some, ranging in size from a few centimeters to over two meters in diameter, remain in their original location. Almost all of them are made of granodiorite, a hard, igneous stone.

Scientists date the spheres to approximately 600 A.D. by pottery styles and radiocarbon dates associated with archeological deposits found nearby. However, there are problems with this methodology because it only reveals when the spheres were last used, and not when they were created.

No one is certain of their origin. Some think they are somehow related to Stonehenge or the giant statues of Easter Island.

3The man who offered his testicles and penis as a meal

In March 2012, Japanese artist Mao Sugiyama, 23, had his penis and testicles surgically removed by a physician. ??So, what did Sugiyama do with his recently disconnected genitalia? He decided to cook up his private parts and serve them to willing diners.

The self-described “asexual” illustrator announced on Twitter: “I am offering my male genitals (full penis, testes, scrotum) as a meal for 100,000 yen ($832USD). I'm Japanese.”

After his private parts were certified free of infection, the junk-free artist cooked up his genitalia and hosted about 70 people for this very, um, special event. Out of the 70, five of the “luckiest” bidders consumed the testicular soup, garnered with mushrooms and parsley.

Because there is no law against cannibalism, Sugiyama was only charged with indecent exposure.

I think I'll stick to miso soup, thank you.

4The rarely seen strange green balls that washed up on beaches in Australia

In September 2014, thousands of green balls washed up on Dee Why Beach near Sydney, Australia. This rare event that the Japanese call marimo, has only been seen a handful of times.

Marimo was first witnessed in the 1820s. The squishy, bright green balls are formed when algae (which naturally secures itself to rocks) gets knocked off and rolled around in the ocean, forming these cool looking orbs.

Colonies of marimo (which roughly translates to “bouncy play ball”) have also been found off the coasts of Scotland, Estonia, Japan and Iceland. There, they are called by the less glamorous name of “ball muck.”

The Japanese, who declared the green balls a national treasure, even created a character modeled after them known as “Marimokkori.” The “mokkori” part of the name is Japanese slang for erection.

5The actor whose attempt at modesty left him in pain

The Batman TV series that ran from 1966-68 was a cultural phenomenon. The show's stars, Adam West and Burt Ward (as Batman and Robin, respectively) became popular television icons. Unfortunately for Ward, he became huge in other ways.

Ward's 1995 autobiography, Boy Wonder: My Life In Tights, details his sexual exploits with fans and the thousands of women to whom he donated his self-described “Batsperm,” which he called “the ultimate autograph.”

He also explained that the network received many complaints about the bulge in Robin's tights. How did they fix this particular problem? An on-set doctor prescribed him mystery pills to shrink his “Batballs" during filming. The pills had an adverse effect, however. Ward says woke up in intense pain with his “limp trouser trout grossly obscured by the dominance of two hugely swollen, grapefruit-size testes.” The name of the chapter, believe it or not, is “Holy Impotence! My Testicles Grew To the Size of Grapefruits!”

Holy TMI Batman!

6The musical piece that was created with the aid of a sex toy

When composer Michael Alan Rose wanted to write a piece of music to stimulate the senses, he wasn't joking! In the second type of Rose's Sui Generis: Five Types for Piano Inside/Out, Rose called on pianist Zubin Kanga to create a variety of strange sounds by rotating a high-pitched Ben Wa ball along the A string inside a piano.

After seeing Kanga “doing things inside the piano that I would have thought impossible," Rose wrote a piece featuring the Kagel muscle exercisers entitled, “Sci-Fi.” According to Rose, Kanga soon rushed into a London sex shop to find some Ben Wa balls for his musical composition.

We hear that when Rose premiered the musical piece at the Blair School of Music's Choral Rehearsal Hall, everyone had a ball…or two.

7The actress whose birthday celebration resulted in 915 “Balls”

People all over the world proved that they still love Lucy with a wide variety of celebrations for legendary comedienne Lucille Ball's 100th birthday celebration on August 6, 2011. Celebrations for the star of I Love Lucy, included marathons of the groundbreaking television show, a museum exhibition and 915 Lucy lookalikes all gathered together.

The Lucy lookalikes gathered in front of a “Vitameatavegamin" sign as part of the annual Lucy Fest celebration in the legendary redhead's hometown of Jamestown, NY in hopes of making the Guinness Book of World Records.

During the gathering in front of the sign (the word is from a classic episode of the show in which Lucy is hired to promote a health tonic that gets her drunk), one man even proposed to his very own “Lucy.”

8The woman who claimed self defense in scrotum attack

According to a probable cause affidavit used in court, 43-year-old Christina Lorina Reber entered the home of her "on-again, off-again" boyfriend in Muncie, Indiana, punched him in the head numerous times, and "grabbed his scrotum and began squeezing as hard as she could." After falling to the floor, the man was later treated at IU Health Ball Memorial Hospital for what authorities called a "long tear on his scrotum."

Despite claiming the attack was in self defense, a jury found Reber guilty. She faces up to 8 years in prison.

Muncie, Indiana is also the home of Ball State University.

9The man who had hair growing out of his eyeball

Recently, a 19 year-old man from Iran was admitted into the Tabriz University of Medical Sciences in Iran for having a very rare tumor removed from his eyeball. The tumor (called a limbal dermoid) is fleshy cyst that grows hair. Yes, you heard right – the man had hair growing out of his eye.

Dermoid cells are skin cells which are able to sprout hair, but they can also generate cartilage, sweat glands and even teeth!

The Iranian teen had the cyst removed before it became a dental procedure and is said to have had 20/60 vision due to the fact that he had a lazy eye and an astigmatism.

10The pollutant-free balls of ice that cost $8 each

It was bound to happen. Now, there is a “luxury ice company.” Gläce Luxury Ice is self described as “the world's leading premium drink-ice brand.”

Like any luxury, it comes at a price. Five of these hand-carved ice balls made from Canadian purified water and free from minerals and pollutants will run you $40. That's $8 for a ball of ice, folks! But, don't take my word for it, go to the company's website and check out their press page with press releases on their frozen spheres of ice. Yes, they even have a publicist for frozen water.

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