What’s The Weirdest Amazon Item Out There? Part One

If you are of the human species and not living under a rock, then you know all about Amazon. But did you know there is a whole lot of really weird stuff that you can buy on Amazon? Here are lots of things from the site, and what may be the number one pick for weird Amazon item.

Hot Dog Trophy on Marble Base

So if you are a competitive hot dog eater, then this is would clearly be the best of the best trophy that you could get. But otherwise…why would they even sell this? It’s beautiful to look at, with a gold, shiny, solid color. It also has a face and legs with shoes, just in case you wanted to think of your hot dog statue as a person. However, if you don’t notice the face and feet, and/or if you see it from a distance, it 100% looks like a dildo. A golden dildo on an platform. A statue or trophy, of a golden dildo. So, keep that in mind about this weird Amazon item.

Melting Pig Steamer

Because you need to have steamed vegetables to be healthy. And really, who wants to have a separate steamer, or a steamer basket, or an attachment steamer? No one. No one wants all those extras in the kitchen. They just want the easiest and quickest way to make the healthiest food they can. This is where the melting pig steamer comes in. It’s just a slab of silicon you can put on top of the boiling pot of water and vegetables and boom. Steamed vegetables, all because of a silicon slab of pig. This is a weird Amazon item for sure, but also very practical.

The Mullet Headband

Actually, mullets are coming back in. Slowly, and it probably won’t be hugely popular again, but still. But if you want a mullet and you don’t want to cut your hair that way, alas, all you need is the mullet headband! This sweatband comes equipped with a mullet wig built in. This makes it perfect for Halloween or if you want to try this style before getting it done to your own hair.

Bacon-Flavored Floss

Because bacon? This is the thing though, floss is supposed to be to clean and take care of your teeth. It’s not supposed to be for the taste. I mean, it’s good if it tastes good, and makes the whole situation more palatable. But bacon? You should buy it though, and try it. Especially if you’re a bacon lover. Otherwise, you could gift it. Because we all know someone that is so in love with bacon, that everything is better with bacon. This may not be the most weird Amazon item, but it’s weird nonetheless.

The Tongue Brush

So this weird Amazon item is sure to be loved by cat ladies and cat lovers of all kinds. If you want to love on your cat like your cat loves on you, (literally by licking,) then this is the perfect gift for your cat, err..you? This harder plastic spiky tongue allows you to kiss, also known as lick, your cat. You can lick its face, side face, neck, and that spot right above its tail. You will love it and so will your cat. You will also look like a fool. But who even cares about that in the name of pet love?

Misprinted Pens

So you know how when companies are trying to send other companies pens? They tailor the pens to the company and make them personable. Then they drop them off, all nonchalant like, for you to use, ie, fall in love with, so that you will want to buy all your pens for your company from that company. But it turns out, this weird Amazon item is something that is pulled together and you can buy 100 of them at a time. You might get 100 different companies pens and you might also get a whole bunch of pens from one company and a whole bunch of randoms from other companies, too. Either way, pens are expensive. So this would be a more cost efficient and variety-filled way to get a bunch of pens that you need anyhow. 

The Boyfriend Pillow

This is good. If you want to cuddle but are single, alone for the night, or a loner for life, you can still sleep and feel as if someone is next to you, and cuddling you. This pillow is half of a man’s torso with an arm attached. This pillow case looks like a men’s button down shirt, or maybe a pajama top, so that you can really act like it’s a man you are cuddling with and up to, instead of a pillow.

The dildo, I mean hot dog trophy, is easily the most weird Amazon item on this list. But there are more so watch for another post about weird things you can buy from Amazon.