12 Ridiculous Gifts You’d Never Like to Receive on Your Birthday (that you can actually buy)

By Donna Gutierrez

1How To Cure Bad Breath

Seriously?! Mint gum would be a more suitable hint.

2Maybe You Touched Your Genitals Hand Sanitizer

The #1 After-genital contact hand sanitizer.
Must be the last thing you expected on your birthday...

3Armpit Hair Shirt

When you work so hard to eliminate that hair, who would want this shirt?

4Happy Birthday Toilet Paper

So that you'll be reminded of your birthday even in the toilet.

5A book about your poo

The surprise of all surprises on your birthday!!

6Cockroach backpack

When everybody else is avoiding it, you have a huge one hanging on your back?

7Butt shorts

Talk about complete mockery…

8A Memo Pad with insults

An insult a day keeps the good vibes away… It's a memo pad, too!!

9Emergency Inflatable Brain

We all forget to use our "brains" at some time in our life... or "loose" our brains, so we have the perfect solution. The inflatable brain will allow you to quickly get your brain back in any emergency. Funny gift for that person to seems to always forget their brain!

10Grow a boyfriend/girlfriend

Not a really good idea for someone who's never been in a relationship.

11The Swearing Finger

Nothing beats a swearing finger wrapped in fancy paper.

12Polly the insulting parrot

Polly is one dirty little bird. Polly looks innocent enough sitting on his little perch, but when Polly detects motion, he lets the expletives fly in a fun parrot voice!