So you've had a few adult beverages and you get the urge to text someone with your alcohol-soaked observations, or it's the next day and you're remembering what a crazy night it was! Either way, these texts are hilariously embarrassing!
All of these texts are courtesy of Texts From Last Night.
1Bad cop!
(267):
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest.
2I am invisible
(727):
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
4Capes are making a comeback
(724):
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
5Or are you just glad to see us?
(720):
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
6Dear Robin, lol
(124):
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
7What friends are for
(505):
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
8Wicked drunk
(419):
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
9This scale goes all the way to "crazy"
(319):
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
10Drugs are bad
(406):
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute