- Unless you all fit at one table, there's usually an adult table and a kid table at the holidays.
Have you heard these naughty Christmas jokes yet? Would you dare share one at family Christmas?
- What do boobs and train toys have in common? They were both
made for kids but dads love to play with them. - What do three ho’s get you? A very happy Santa.
- What’s better about a Christmas tree than a man? A Christmas tree stays up for 12 nights, have cute balls and look good with the lights on.
- Are you Jingle Bells? Because you look like you’re ready to go all the way.
- Have you heard about Adolph, the brown-nosed reindeer? He can run fast like Rudolph, he just cannot stop as fast.
- Why did Mrs. Claus divorce Santa? She was tired of all his irritating ho’s.
- What makes a Christmas tree better than a man? Even the small ones are satisfying. Is this one of the best naughty Christmas jokes?
- Is your name Christmas? Because I want to merry you!
- Is that a candy cane in your pocket or are you happy to see me?
- Why did the Grinch stop at the liquor store? He was looking for some holiday spirit.
- Why does Santa come down the chimney? He knows it’s better than coming in the back door.
- Why did Santa make sure his daughter went to college? He wanted to keep her off the North Pole.
- What do you call a Santa that lives in the North and South Pole? A bi-polar Santa.
- Why was the snowman smiling? There was a snowblower coming down the street.
- What do priests and Christmas trees have in common? Their balls are just ornamental.
- What was Santa singing as he came down the chimney? “Chest and nuts roasting on an open fire…”
- What makes Santa so jolly? He knows where all the naughty girls live. is this solid as one of the naughty Christmas jokes?
- Why are Christmas trees such a fan of the past? Because the presents are beneath them.
- What do the girl reindeer do when Santa takes the males out to fly the sleigh? They go to town and blow more than a few bucks.
- Why did the snowman ask for a divorce? His wife was a total flake.
- Why did the Grinch rob the liquor store? He needed some holiday spirit?
- What’s the difference between snowman and snowwomen?
Snowballs. - Why doesn’t Santa have his own kids? Because he only comes once a year. This is one of the funniest of all the naughty Christmas jokes!
- Want to see the North Pole? At least, that’s what Mrs. Claus calls it.
- What’s the difference between Tom Sandoval and Santa? Santa was smart enough to keep it at three ho’s.
- What does Santa think the best idea for safe sex is? He says to wrap your package before you shove it down the chimney.
- What’s a present Santa doesn’t want for Christmas? A sweater, he’d rather have a moaner or a screamer.
- Why does Santa land on the roof? He likes it on top.
- If your left leg is Thanksgiving and your right leg is New Years, can I visit you between the holidays?
So, what do you think of these naughty Christmas jokes? Let me know in the comments?