- Unsurprisingly, this professor is no longer employed by the university.
When something equally outrageous and weird happens at a college, you’re usually not wrong in suspecting out-of-control frat boys or other students gone wild. This case, however, shows that college professors aren’t above getting freaky.
A now-former professor of a Minnesota university is facing felony charges for one bizarre crime spree. Paul Fischer is accused of pouring his urine onto people’s belongings.
Repeatedly.
The incidents came to light after a student who left her backpack alone for just a few minutes discovered it had been soaked in pee. An investigation revealed that Fischer was the likely culprit, but that wasn’t all.
The results also implicated him in multiple other similar pee attacks.
Apparently, the professor had developed a habit of relieving himself in single-use containers. For reasons that haven’t yet been established, he then took to emptying those containers in various places – including people’s unattended water bottles.
Fischer has now resigned from the teaching position he had held for a quarter century. He has been charged with a felony and could be facing years in jail.
Ruined Backpack
The university at the center of the strange incidents is Macalester College in St. Paul, Minnesota. Fischer had been working at the school as a biology professor for 25 years without complaint.
However, things changed on December 5, 2025. Speaking to police, a female student stated that she had gone into the college’s Olin-Rice Science Center to work on a study project.
At one point, she stepped outside of the lab for no more than six minutes, she stated. She left her backpack with its contents in the room, as it had previously been a safe space.
However, when she returned, she discovered that something weird had happened to her belongings. The bag was wet, and whatever the yellow stuff that had spilled on it was, it had soaked into the contents as well.
Now, here’s a pop quiz. If a liquid is yellow like urine and smells like urine, what is it?
Correct, it’s urine.
Understandably, nobody wants to keep pee-drenched objects. According to an itemized list the unidentified student provided the police, the urine attack ruined around $2,000 worth of stuff, including the bag
Further Revelations
In February 2026, the student reported the incident to the police. It’s not clear why she waited two months, but hey – you’d probably be upset for a while too if somebody peed on your things.
The St. Paul police launched an investigation into the matter. As part of their sleuthing, the cops contacted the college, which informed them that the school was already carrying out its own investigation into the urine incidents.
That right: incidents, plural. Macalester College’s inquest had revealed at least five similar cases involving spilled urine.
However, the objects that had been drenched in pee were not limited to bags. The school had found out that someone had dumped urine in trash cans, inside decorations handed to school staff, and even water bottles.
I can only hope that the people owning those bottles noticed their drink was compromised before they took a sip.
Urinating in Cups
So, who was behind the pee attacks? Surely it must’ve been some unruly students more interested in causing mayhem than studying?
Nope. The investigators determined it was the 55-year-old, respected long-time career professor Fischer.
According to court documents, the authorities confronted Fischer about the allegations before officially charging him. Fischer claimed that over the past couple of years, he had “developed a habit of urinating in a cup” while at work.
He added that he would dispose of the contents by dumping the pee in trash cans or laboratory sinks. In the case of the female student, he claimed that he’d been emptying a urine cup into a garbage can near his office when it spilled onto her backpack.
How that’s supposed to explain the pee in water bottles and staff awards is not entirely clear.
Following the revelations, Fischer resigned from his position at Macalester College. He has been charged with felony first-degree damage to property, which carries maximum penalties of up to $10,000 in fines and five years in prison.