- It’s confirmed, folks — Florida is contagious.
Oh Florida, never change. Well, maybe it should, but at least the Sunshine State is an endless treasure trove of unhinged people doing absolutely bizarre stunts.
For a prime example, you don’t need to look any further than this case. The questionable heroine of our story endangered countless lives before pulling a real class act at the end.
Courtney Epps from South Carolina recently led Florida cops on a high-speed chase down US 1, the road leading through the picturesque Florida Keys. Yes, we know she’s not Floridian, but you wouldn’t believe that from her behavior.
The 41-year-old woman roared down the highway at speeds reaching up to 120 miles per hour. At one point, she barely missed hundreds of marathon runners jogging by the side of the road.
The cops finally ended her rampage and took her in. Yet, Epps wasn’t done with her antics.
Once she was taken to a hospital, the woman proceeded to loudly sing gospel songs — while urinating on herself.
You probably won’t be surprised to find that Epps was under the influence of… Something, we’re not quite sure what. She’s now in jail facing an expansive list of charges.
Speed Racer
The high-speed car chase happened on Sunday, December 10. On the day, troopers from the Florida Highway Patrol (FHP) noticed a car driving on US 1 in ways that can only be described as “extremely illegal.”
Behind the wheel of the gray Chevrolet Suburban was Epps. We’re not quite sure where to begin listing her traffic violations.
For starters, she was traveling well above the road’s speed limit of 55 miles per hour. Additionally, she was traveling north (that is, away from Key West) on the southbound lanes, seemingly oblivious to the oncoming traffic.
Needless the say, the FHP troopers decided to stop her. Yet, Epps made no effort to do so.
We’d like to say that she ignored the sirens and flashing lights, but that wouldn’t be quite true. She must’ve been aware of them on some level, as she only stepped on the gas harder.
As the troopers pursued Epps over the famous Seven-Mile Bridge, they registered her traveling at speeds ranging from 90 to 120 miles per hour.
A Near Miss
Since Epps didn’t intend to stop on her own, the troopers decided that she needed a bit of help. They tried to bring her to a halt twice using spike strips.
Somehow, Epps managed to evade the first one. But the second strip, deployed near the Channel #5 bridge, got her.
The spikes shredded three tried on Epps’ Chevrolet. Yet, even that wasn’t enough to make the woman stop.
She simply kept careening forward on her burst tires — straight toward a large group of runners participating in a half marathon.
Fortunately, Epps’ car missed the runners. As she zoomed by them, two of the wrecked tires on her car finally gave up and broke off.
In another stroke of luck, neither tire hit anybody. They did, however, cause significant damage to two of the marathon organizers’ vehicles parked by the side of the road.
Finally, Epps crashed into a construction site near Mile Marker 80. Cops quickly swarmed her car and took her into custody.
Her Final Stunt
As the troopers dragged Epps out of her ruined vehicle, it was clear that she wasn’t in a functioning state of mind.
“[She had] extremely constricted pupils and did not respond to verbal or physical stimulation, only stared straight forward in silence,” her arrest report stated according to Local 10 News.
Uncertain whether Epps was under the influence or experiencing some kind of medical situation, the officers took her to a hospital. Yet, she wasn’t done causing public outrage.
While she was getting checked out in the hospital lobby, Epps began to sing gospel songs in a loud voice. As she did so, she also decided to relieve herself into her pants.
Classy.
Having evacuated her bladder, Epps began to pass in and out of consciousness. While receiving treatment, she repeatedly alternated between sleeping, singing, and talking nonsense to herself.
At first, she agreed to a field sobriety test. Bizarrely enough, a breathalyzer showed a blood alcohol level of 0.0, so whatever she was on wasn’t booze.
We don’t know what she was on, though. After blowing into the breathalyzer, Epps suddenly refused to give a urine sample, claiming “God the Father had told her to stop.”
Following this, she was booked into the Plantation Key Jail, where she is being held on a $16,000 bond. Among the litany of things she’s been charged with are DUI and feeling or eluding with disregard for the safety of persons or property.
As we said in the beginning, Epps might not be from Florida, but the state has clearly rubbed off on her.