- From fart jokes to computers, some things are way older than you might think.
It’s that time again, folks. It’s time to look at some of the funny, strange, and amazing times in history when something occurred for the first time.
We’ve done this before, twice in fact, but human history is long. There are so many more weird first times to cover, but we’re up to the challenge to try and hit them all.
So, here you go — yet another six fun and weird world firsts.
World’s First Speed Limit for Cars — 1861
We previously covered the world’s first speeding ticket and automotive fatality, so we figured it’d be appropriate to kick this list off with another traffic safety-related record. The world’s first automobile speed limit dates to 1861.
That limit was put in place throughout Great Britain by the first Locomotive Act. The law set the speed limit on open roads in town at 10 miles per hour.
The timing of the first automobile speed limit is kind of weird, considering that Karl Benz wouldn’t launch the first officially recognized modern car until 24 years later. That said, there were one-off automobile contraptions built before that — so jolly old England must’ve been overrun by inventive but careless engineers, considering they needed the law.
Also, the Brits must’ve obeyed the speed limit, since the first speeding ticket wasn’t handed out until 1896.
World’s First Recorded (Fart) Joke — 1900 BC
Some things never change, such as people’s penchant for immature jokes. The world’s oldest recorded joke dates to around 1900 BC — and it’s a fart joke.
The joke originates from ancient Sumer in the region that today covers southern Iraq. The joke goes as follows: “What has never occurred since times immemorial? A young woman who did not fart in her husband’s lap.”
Apparently, Sumerian maidens were prone to flatulence. Then again, we’ve all probably let one rip at an embarrassingly inconvenient moment.
Funnily enough, the world’s first bar joke is also Sumerian. It goes: “A dog walks into a bar and says, ‘I cannot see a thing. I’ll open this one.’”
If you’re not laughing, don’t worry — nobody else is either. The cultural context of the punchline has been lost to history and no one knows what’s supposed to be funny about the joke.
World’s First Person Killed by a Robot — 1979
Homicidal robots are a sci-fi staple, but we don’t have to wait until the far future for them to become a reality. The first time a robot killed a human being happened already almost half a century ago.
On January 25, 1979, Robert Williams — aged 25 — was working his shift at Ford’s metal casting plant in Flat Rock, Michigan. The facility operated a cutting-edge robot moving one-ton transfer vehicles, designed to move heavy castings to and from high storage shelves.
On the day, the robot erroneously reported that there were no castings on the shelf. Confused by the error message, supervisors asked Williams to climb onto the shelf and check that everything looked right up there.
Sadly, nobody thought to stop the robot. As Williams climbed onto the storage rack, the machine slammed one of the casting transfer vehicles down on top of him, instantly killing the young man.
World’s First Computer — 200 BC
Take a guess when the world’s first computer was built. The 1960s? Maybe even 1940s?
You’ll have to go way further back than that. The Antikythera mechanism, the world’s first known analog computer, was made all the way back around 200 BC.
Granted, this primitive calculation device couldn’t run email or word processors. It was a rotating model of the solar system that was used to predict various celestial phenomena.
Still, it was shockingly good at what it did. According to people who have researched the device’s remains, it could predict things like solar eclipses decades in advance.
World’s First eBay Sale — 1995
A little website called eBay went online on September 3, 1995 — although at the time it was titled AuctionWeb. The first sale on the site (obviously) happened soon after.
What’s weird about the first sale, though, is the item. It was a broken laser pointer.
The thing wasn’t a scam, though. The pointer was listed by eBays’ founder Pierre Omidyar, who clearly stated in the listing that the thing didn’t work and it was more of a proof of concept.
The original price was one dollar, but after a short bidding battle, the broken pointer sold for $14.83. Omidyar contacted the buyer afterward and asked why on earth he paid so much for a broken piece of office equipment.
It turns out the buyer was someone who collects laser pointers, functional or not.
World’s First Brain Surgery — 8000 BC
Brain surgery is generally considered one of the most challenging medical procedures known to modern science. Considering our still fairly limited knowledge of how the brain works, you might imagine that brain surgery is a recent discipline.
You’d be wrong, though. Archeologists have found proof of brain surgery operations dating back 10,000 years.
Most of these primitive brain surgeries consist of trepanation, which involves drilling or scraping a hole into the skull. The procedure was often done to relieve intracranial pressure, but sometimes the brain could be operated on as well.
The thing is, there is proof that people survived the operation — not often, but it was possible. Researchers have discovered trephined skulls displaying new bone growth around the hole, which obviously can’t happen if the patient is dead.