Weird Things People Do In Public

• Do you do any of these weird things in public?

What do you think are the weird things people do in public? Do you smile at strangers or look at other people’s groceries cart?

• Walk faster when someone is behind you.
• Suddenly become aware of your walking.
• Wonder what your arms are doing.
• Wonder where you’re supposed to look.
• Pretend you’re checking your phone.
• Look at a random sign like it’s fascinating.
• Pretend you’re looking for something in your bag.
• Avoid eye contact with someone you recognize.
• See someone you know and debate whether to say hello.
• Decide not to.
• Then wonder if they thought you were rude.
• Smile at strangers.
• Smile at dogs.
• Say hello to dogs before humans.
• Look at someone’s dog. Do you agree these are weird things people do?
• Make eye contact with the dog.
• Feel obligated to compliment the dog.
• Look at someone’s shopping cart.
• Secretly judge their groceries.
• Compare their cart to yours.
• Wonder what their dinner plans are.
• Invent a backstory for someone.
• Wonder what strangers do for work.
• Wonder where they’re going.
• Wonder if they live nearby.
• Notice someone’s outfit.
• Remember the outfit all day.
• See someone wearing something you want.
• Pretend not to stare.
• Stare anyway.
• Read someone’s book title.
• Look at someone’s phone screen accidentally.
• Then intentionally.
• Immediately pretend you weren’t looking.
• Listen to a stranger’s conversation.
• Catch yourself listening.
• Pretend you’re fascinated by something nearby.
• Stand too close to someone in line.
• Realize it.
• Step back.
• Step too far back.
• Wonder whether the person noticed.
• Stand awkwardly at the checkout.
• Forget where to put your card.
• Tap your card twice.
• Wonder if it worked.
• Check the screen. Do you agree these are weird things people do?
• Check your bank app afterward.
• Put your wallet away.
• Immediately need it again.
• Put your receipt somewhere.
• Lose it.
• Put your groceries in the wrong bag.
• Apologize to the cashier for absolutely nothing.
• Say “sorry” when someone asks you to move.
• Say “thank you” to the self-checkout machine.
• Argue with the self-checkout machine.
• Panic when it says unexpected item in bagging area.
• Look around as if someone is judging you.
• Pretend you know what you’re doing.
• Need help.
• Pretend you don’t need help.
• Finally ask for help.
• Feel embarrassed.
• Get in the wrong line.
• Stay there because changing lines feels socially complicated.
• Watch another line move faster.
• Regret your life choices.
• Switch lines.
• Your old line immediately moves.
• Feel personally betrayed.
• Choose a checkout lane based on instinct.
• Choose the slowest one.
• Watch everyone else leave first.
• Stand in an elevator and stare at the floor.
• Avoid eye contact.
• Suddenly become fascinated by the numbers.
• Press your floor button.
• Press it again.
• Wonder whether pressing it twice makes it faster.
• Stand near the elevator door.
• Move away. Do you agree these are weird things people do?
• Move back.
• Let someone exit.
• Accidentally block someone.
• Apologize.
• Hold a door open for too long.
• Run toward a door because someone is holding it.
• Walk awkwardly fast.
• Say thank you breathlessly.
• Go through a revolving door and question your timing.
• Walk into a glass door.
• Pretend nothing happened.
• Look around to see who saw.
• Check whether anyone laughed.
• Laugh at yourself if they did.
• Pretend you meant to do it.
• Trip over nothing.
• Look at the ground like the ground betrayed you.
• Keep walking.
• Pretend it never happened. Do you agree these are weird things people do?
• Remember it at bedtime.
• See someone wave.
• Wave back.
• Realize they weren’t waving at you.
• Experience immediate spiritual collapse.
• Pretend you were fixing your hair.
• Walk away.
• Never emotionally recover.

What weird things people do apply to you? Tell us in the comments!